Dear Santa Jesus
by: Rev. DanFrom the Times Record [it must be a slow day for] News:
It started out as a simple class assignment at John Tower Elementary School: write a letter to Santa Claus.
But when one parent learned of the project and asked if her child could write a letter to Jesus instead, she was surprised at what she was told.
“No.”
“Why not?” she asked.
“Because that would be religious,” said the classroom aide.
That didn’t sit well with Paula Shepherd, a born-again Christian.
Of course, it’s obvious as to where things go from there.
Why is this crap actually reported as news? We all know that the minute you tell a Christian parent that educators have to respect all religions, or that it’s ok to write letters to non-religious fictional characters, that they’ll go batshit and freak out.
“You’d rather have them write a letter to someone who is not real rather than let my daughter write a letter to someone who’s real?” Shepherd said. “Even if you don’t believe in Jesus, you can at least admit that he was a real person who existed.”
There’s no historical proof that Jesus Christ, as reported in the Bible, actually existed. We know from Josephus that there were TONS of people named Jesus at the time, but that proves what? There’s also a Jesus who works at the bank down the street from my house. Santa Claus has personally left me gifts, wrapped by elves, with tags on the packages with my name and his on them. Which one is more real? The one who left me tangible gifts, or the one who wants me to be an obedient sheep?
Jesus, however, is totally real to this woman (which is probably why she needs therapy):
Maybe the Shepherds are sensitive to the distinction because they call Hope their “miracle child.” She was born after years of infertility and prayer. Shepherd said she even got some startling “words from God” that assured her that she would have a baby, it would be a girl, and that she should respond in faith by giving her a name with the initials HIS.
When Hope [the now-3-year-old daughter] was born, she was named Hope Isabella Shepherd.
Wow, what an amazing vision. Consider how screwed she would have been if her last name hadn’t started with an “S.” Would she then have had to divorce her husband so that she could respond in faith? Faith in what? Superstition?
The principal of the school gets a “A+” though… she’s one smart woman.
“We honor all parents’ requests,” she said Thursday. Shepherd had talked to the paraprofessional in the child’s class, not the teacher. The question caught the aide off guard, she said.
Something like this comes up more often at Halloween, [Principal] Darnall said. “From pre-K to fifth grade, we often have students that choose not to participate in some activity for religious reasons. We honor that completely and always have and always will.”
It’s most remarkable that 3-year-olds are writing letters at all, she said.
The happy ending pleased the Shepherds.
The class assignment was changed to allow the children to write letters to anybody they want to … even Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
Now, that’s just dumb. He’s Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, not Rudolph the literate reindeer. We all know reindeer can’t read.
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